A Mumbai Wedding

Hello Masala-ites,

It looks as though I have been an absentee blogger as of late. My appologies. Let's get you caught up on the latest adventures.


Daddy G and I dumped our 2 darling daughters on his sister and went to Mumbai to celebrate the wedding of a friend of ours from New York. Aside from our Goa trip, Daddy G and I have never traveled alone, so I was excited to take a trip with him without the kids.

We had a straight forward flight to Mumbai (that of course started at an ungodly hour of the morning).  We spent the first day exploring South Bombay/Colaba. After much security and id producing, we checked into our nice, but small hotel room right behind the Taj.  We ate at Leopolds, and Cafe Mondegar, which are long standing institutions in Colaba. I had read about Leopolds in Shantaram (a book), so I was thrilled to try it. I had Akara, which is an egg/masala/tomato dish that I loved, but Daddy G found too heavy for breakfast. It's a Parsi (or originated) joint, and if you're good, you can spot some artwork on the walls corresponding to that. Akara is a Parsi dish by the way. Leopolds was unfortunately involved in a terrorist act on Mumbai in 2008, and number of people died there. The heaviness still hangs in the air, but it's a nice place to eat for tourism value. Cafe Mondegar is delightfully chaotic and kitschy. With about 2 inches of personal space between tables and walls COVERED in art and stuff, it's an experience. Food was good though. I'm still not sure how the very professional waiters got around that place.

Colaba is most definitely a tourist place. I accordingly dragged Daddy G all over just taking it all in. We had a pretty free itinerary without the kids and roamed all over South Mumbai. I did some shopping at fashion street for both my kids and myself. To my great disappointment, no one wanted to bargain 1 rupee. After all the stories, it was a bit disappointing, even though nothing was too expensive.

We met up with another college friend of Daddy G and ended up a bit drunk and eating sushi in a Japanese place. I LOVE sushi, but I never thought I would be eating in India. Pleasant surprise.

The next day we took a cab north to meet up with our friend. As decently well off Gujaratis in Mumbai, the wedding was a 3 day affair. This was day 1 in a sari all day for me. We had brunch. and hung out to watch the puja (religious ceremony) that came along with it. All the girls got mehndi done on their hands, which I absolutely loved. It looked a bit like the picture below, only mine stopped right under my palms and my finger tips were completely colored in.

I definitely want to do this again. it stayed on my hands FOREVER, although was quite faded after 3 days. It's India - you HAVE to wash your hands all the time. After the function, we went out with some friends to  a pub and hung out for an hour or two. SO great to go out at night and now worry about it turning 11 and everything shutting down. We stayed in the ISKON temple (they keep rooms for devotees, of which our friend's uncle was) which was beautiful. The rooms were spacious and beautiful. I ended up getting sick that evening, which I thought could possibly be attributed to too much Old Monk and cigarettes at the pub. Unfortunately this wasn't the case.

The next day was the Barat (in which everyone dances the groom down the street to the wedding venue) and the actual wedding. I woke up with a fever and Delhi Belly. I was in no condition to be attending, but could not really bow out and thought if I just hung in there, I could see most of it. I put on another sari and we left. I realized when I got there that standing up was absolutely exhausting. I tried hiding out on a couch corner, which lasted until we got in the car to go dance. In India you can't just sit down on the ground or lean on anything (everything is just dirty), so the wait was absolutely torture for me. I sat in the car for a while, which helped, but then Daddy G pulled me out to go dance with everyone. In case you don't know, I have the dancing skills of a spastic anteater. Seriously. I just cannot dance for beans. I sucked it up and participated - even though it was so hard. I enjoyed myself a lot though, spastic or not. I was exhausted by the time we got to the wedding hall, which was on a military base. A big, walled in courtyard was decorated with fabric, flowers, and tons of lights. It was pretty and we sat at tables. I was barely upright at this point, so Daddy G brought me back to the temple to sleep it off. The only thing I regret was not being able to join in the eating,  Daddy G told me it was truly impressive how many appetizers and dishes they had. 

I woke up feeling better the next day, which is pretty normal for me. We caught a play at Prithvi Theater - one of the oldest theater's in Mumbai. It's tucked back in a nice neighborhood in a small building. They have a mix of Hindi, Marati (local language in Maharashtra where Mumbai is located) and English plays. We saw Jungle Book, which was a mix of Hindi and Marati. I didn't understand everything, but the play was extremely well done, and not a kiddy play, even though there were lots of kids present. The actors obviously enjoy their craft and work very hard at it. You simply must go there if you are in Mumbai. 

We spent the afternoon on Juhu beach which was delightfully uncrowded and decently clean, but not for swimming.

The cocktail reception was that evening, so I finally decked up in Western clothes and we ate and drank a stupidly large amount and danced our butts off. It was amazing fun. Don't think stuffy cocktails, it's more like open bar, DJ, dance floor, and buffet with lots of drunk, partying people. We even got to see the Mumbai cops drop by at 3 am to try and shut the party down. I'm not sure how much money changed hands, but I'm sure some did.

The next day was free and we woke up very late - we were out til 5 am. We wandered around the northern section of Juhu and walked by the seaside. We ended up in the bandstand, which is a part type area with walkways and climbing near the sea. After a call from a friend, we ended up on the beach in the evening and explored all the Mumbai chats and street food.  We just hung out on the beach at night. We had lots of good conversation when we weren't being mobbed by ladies trying to give me henna - which I already had, or guys offering massages (which were surprisingly legit). The next morning we flew back home.

Overall, I LOVED Mumbai. We went in winter time and I heard it's quite hot and humid in summer time. I wouldn't necessarily want to live there, but I sure did enjoy visiting and seeing the Gujarati version of a Mumbai wedding.

Online Piano and Keyboard Classes

Hello Online Bloggy Friends, how's it hanging?

I have a proposition for all of you (Oh no. Definitely not that kind.) that I was hoping to get some feedback on.

So as I've harped on plenty enough, I teach piano. To be quite honest with the intertubes, I absolutely love teaching. Love it. 

As of now, I have around 27 students and am about topping off on capacity of students that I can teach in person. I also have noticed a decent population of working adults (at least in India) that would love to learn, but are completely overtaken with work and can only come on the weekends (of which lessons are currently full on Saturday A.M's for me). 

The idea goes that I will have video lessons (which students should work on about a week at a time) online, 1 day guarantee email support for questions, once weekly student/teacher Skype interactions for performance, level appropriate exams, and additional educational assistance/materials.

So here's where I need your feedback:
Would you take classes online?
What services/support would you need to be convinced to take classes in an online environment?

I also am looking for some fearless volunteers to go through 2 months worth of classes (on me!) a month or two from right now and give some feedback about the program. It's completely free for volunteers, unless I get completely bowled over by eager learners! Then we may need to limit numbers. 

The thing you would need to participate: 

• A piano/keyboard to practice on - doesn't need to be yours, but it should play
• The appropriate computer equipment to view videos and conduct skype sessions with sound, which I'm going to guess most of you will be equipped with
• A willingness to try out playing the piano.
• The time to commit to 4 (30 minute) Skype meetings per month (about once per week)
• The ability to not be a troll. Sexual comments/innuendos/invitations are entertaining, but a waste of my time in this experiment. Just don't.

I've been told I'm a good teacher and that I have a great rapport with all different ages, but you can feel free to try it out and give your own feedback as needed.

Even if you choose not to participate, please do let me know your thoughts on the idea. I do need some idea as to whether there is any interest in this at all.

Becky

Why Kerala is Awesome to Visit.

So the G family recently invaded Kerala for a visit. Overall, it was a nice trip. The people were for the most part friendly and polite. Here are the highlights:

1. Taking a non-night train is a long and tedious option - especially with kids. 12 hours type long. in one seat. The scenery was fabulous, but how long can you really watch scenery? That being said, it was a novelty and the kids liked the vendors being around all the time.
2. Cochin/Fort Kochi was fun to visit. I ironically got to appreciate some Dutch heritage and I'm a culture/history junkie. Our hotel was in a great location for wandering around. The architecture was very interesting to see.

The View Behind our Hotel

Crazy Mix of the Old, The New, and the Tragically Dirty Beach

Holla Dutch Folks!

3. Munnar was great. It doesn't have the same feel as the rest of India but the cooler weather and amazing views were much appreciated, especially after being in Fort Kochi.

Lots of waterfalls to be found.

The view from our hotel room back porch

From outside.

They had frikkin Emus. It was awesome.

This right here is just not right. I heard Gasolina in Kerala more than I have anywhere else. And not just in Munnar.

4. There's not much in Thekkady, but we did see a martial arts show that was very cool to watch. Do see one when you go to Kerala. Unless you plan to go on a big, expensive safari, there is absolutely no wildlife in the preserve. Even then, I have my doubts.

This is a squirrel, people. It was the size of an opossum.

Funniest thing ever - this monkey stole that bottle out of someone's hand, opened it, and drank it, relaxed as anything.

Seriously big spider.

5. Alleppy was absolutely one of the coolest places I have ever been. We stayed in a hotel so far out in the middle of no where that the road was barely big enough for one car. With a compound on one side and a canal on the other, it was a bit nerve wracking, but it was so quiet and peaceful, we loved it.

One of the infamous houseboats

6. Flying back was the best decision ever.
7. Unless you hate it, eat fish. Keralans know fish, especially in the backwaters.
8. Unless you LOVE elephants, try to stay away from the elephant traps. They're a bit sad.

The not so great:
1. Kerala is hot and humid - even in the middle of winter (unless you are up in the mountains). The hotels in Fort Kochi will have air, (if you take an AC room and it's not during a power cut) but no where else will. Open air dining is pretty much the only option here.
2. The mosquitoes have orgies every 2.3 seconds. Even inside during the day, the mosquitoes are completely out of control. Bring bug spray. And long sleeves/pants.
3. Don't plan to be unique if you're white in Fort Kochi. You cannot swing a chopstick there without hitting 4 different white people. Not only will you not be unique, you will be seen as a sales target and Keralans in tourist areas are a bit more pushy than in other places in India. They post signs about no pressure sales inside, but harass you outside.
4. Most of the handcrafts/art you will see will be generic Indian kitch and not Keralan art. Unfortunately, even in the areas that don't cater to white people.
5. Kerala is not so much an activity place as a relax and enjoy the scenery place. You may or may not enjoy this.
6. The possibility of Big Spiders - Very Big Spiders. I saw many with very large webs along the road in Munnar. Hand sized spiders people.

The One in Which I Admit that I’m a Horrible Blogger. And Lonely.

Alrighty then. So this should come as a surprise to actually no one. Hello, my name is Becky G and I’m a horrible blogger. I blog about as often as I call my mother or my friends, which I suppose makes me a terrible daughter and friend, but we’ll leave that for another post. I could give you all the excuses (I’m too busy!) but I’ll spare you even if they are true. Really, I suck at making myself write every day (or few days, or week or damn, how long has it been??).

One of the reasons I’ve been absent from writing is some of the things that have been going on in India lately. Trust me, I have a What the Hell India brewing in my mind and I have a lot to say on what’s been happening. I don’t want to get into this just yet though.

The G family has been in India for a year now. We’ve settled in for all practical purposes. Try not to fall over in surprise, but I have actually made my own friends and I have my own activities going on. I knew that I would probably be lonely before we settled in and I got used to things – anyone with 2 pickles worth of common sense would realize this. What I didn’t plan on was really, really missing my family and the US in general even after we had adjusted and started making friends.  I find myself day dreaming about my friends and the small town with a sense of loss and missing that I never ever had in the US, even though I left that town over 10 years ago and logically don’t want to move back there.

I find it difficult to admit this to people that I talk to from the US because so many told me it would happen. Everyone hates being told “I told you so”, even if it’s true and that person knew it was coming. I would hate for people to think that I’m miserable and pouty and so achingly homesick that I can’t function and I hate it here. That’s just the thing – I don’t. I love it here! As I mentioned, I have friends, I run a business, the weather is perfect right now, I get around and am able to do what I need to get done even with Daddy G travelling. But my Grandmother has been unwell recently. As I mentioned before, she is one of my favorite people on the entire earth. I actually wondered if I would see her alive again, which broke my heart. Even if I wanted to go to her town if she got sick (or god forbid died) I couldn’t, which is very different from living in New York. The fact that I can’t just jump on a plane every time I needed to and fly home is really doing a number on my psych.

We’re planning  a trip to the US in May and I’m super excited about it.  I have the feeling that I’ll be gob smacked  by the sense of not belonging (which happens EVERY time I wander back to the town I grew up in) which would be a good thing. Having this place reinforced as home will be good for my mind, even if I do miss my family. I’m used to seeing them every year for a month, so it will be good to spend the time with them. I have a sneaking suspicion that the US will be a bit alien to me since I’ve been gone so long. Folks, I haven’t driven a car in a year and I’m almost afraid to now. Stick that in your pipe and smoke it for a while. People can change a lot in the course of a year depending on the surroundings.

Unfortunately, I don’t think this feeling will go away any time soon and will just have to be one I learn to live with as long as we live far away from my family.

Becky

Upcoming

Hello Spice Lovers,

Sorry for being a bit spotty with the writing as of late. Life has been tossing me around a bit and it's been hard to gather my thoughts up into a coherent, well, anything.

The G family is launching off to Kerala for a week to see what there is to be seen. Stay tuned for details and pictures. Oh yes, there will be pictures.

Becky

What the Hell India - Marrying off Children to Avoid Rape

Hello Folks.

My apologies for generally being absent from blogging as of late - life has indeed been busy for me. I'm currently teaching 13 students and planning a recital. It takes up WAY more time than you or I think.

So. Another installment of What the Hell India is on the agenda.

The state of Haryana (which houses Delhi FYI) has an absolutely horrid record when it comes to rape. This week, a case has come to the attention of the papers of a Dalit (lower economic class) woman who was gang raped by multiple young men coming from richer houses.

 Here is Haryana for your reference:

Because everything in India has a political undercurrent, the Dalit leader from Haryana felt it necessary to weigh in. His opinion was that we just need to change marriage laws to get children married in order to avoid rape.

Ok, what the Sam diddly hell???

1. The Dalit representative had no answers for why this happened to married women or why married men where often the culprits.

2. He also ignored the fact that being married young often leads to spousal abuse and is responsible for a great number of malnutrition cases.

3. This is not the 18th century.

4. Marrying young is a foolproof way to ensure that the woman will be much less likely to be educated or financially independent.


The problem here is not when young ladies get married - it is a problem involving a patriarchal society with way too few protections for women. As much as I love this country, I cannot ignore the fact that women of all ages and socioeconomic niches are generally left out in the open when it comes to making women equal. Unfortunately, rape is a reality in India, one far too many women have to face. In an ideal world, no woman should have to worry about being accosted by a group of men while walking to her grandmother's house during the day. She should not have to stay inside during the night if no male is there to escort her outside for whatever reason she needs to go out. Unfortunately, India is a society that holds far too many men accountable that this is still as big of a problem as it is. Non-accountability added to non action on the part of society marks this action as passively acceptable. We are not in the stone ages anymore. Rape is never ok, no matter what the circumstances are.

My own husband has urged me not to go walking in the outside ring of our compound late at night. In general, for a woman with a tiny bit of common sense, this is common knowledge. Rape has nothing to do with sexuality and everything to do with control. And India has a very poor record when it comes to allowing women to control themselves; it's almost a national ethos. Even the idea that a woman belongs in the kitchen adds to the general idea that a woman has no right to control her own life.

India, this is not modern country behavior. This nonsense has to stop. The UN pleaded with the entire country to not take this suggestion of child marriage seriously at all. It will NOT solve this problem, it will only set the country back a few hundred years and add to the burden of problems this country is already facing. For the love of everything holy, can we stop treating women like weak little idiots that can't possibly control themselves, their future or their sexuality and just start valuing them as the half of society that they are? This is definitely one issue that breaks my heart on a regular basis solely because it's not at all rare.

Knock it the heck off men. And everyone, let's not accept solutions that set us back a few hundred years instead of calling this problem as it really is.

Becky

The Mysterious Case of the Noisy Newspaper

Alright. So the kids are outside playing, I’m sufficiently caffeinated, and I’ve managed to avoid the never ending game of spider solitaire that usually gets in the way of writing. I have another fun India story for you. Hopefully you’ll find it as entertaining as I did.

I was reading my trusty Times of India paper and not The Hindu the other day (because the newspaper man must be asked at least 4 times before I get the correct paper on a consistent basis, but that’s a story for a different day) as I was sipping my morning coffee. This is quite the routine of mine and I do it pretty much every day, along with checking what blogs I can remember I used to follow. This day, however, I was behind on newspapers for 3 days. I settled in to plow through them all at once. My housekeeper Indira was here and was in the kitchen washing the dishes.

I was nicely reading some unimportant clip about Bollywood drama when the paper started buzzing. I’m not talking barely there vibrations from a fan or my imagination, I’m talking cell phone/adult toy type vibration level. I sat there for a moment dumbly looking at the paper thinking that papers are definitely NOT supposed to vibrate. Then the thought came to my mind that perhaps a rogue bee/wasp/hornet zilla had become stuck inside the paper somehow. We all know how much I love the bees.

I immediately did the most logical thing possible and threw the paper across the room. The vibrations stopped, so I went to investigate. I gingerly lifted one page at a time, ready to make my escape should an angry, sting-ey insect come out looking for vengeance. I found nothing, so I figured he had tumbled out of the paper and was waiting in some dark corner under a piece of furniture planning his next attack.

I grabbed the paper and sat down again to read. No one should be at all surprised that the paper started buzzing again. I of course let out a small shriek and threw the paper again. Indira came into the room concerned that there was something actually wrong with me. I of course was standing there like a cartoon with my hand over my mouth, embarrassed that I was screaming like a little girl about something I hadn’t even seen. I again, slowly sorted through the pages. When I got to the back, the paper started buzzing like mad on the floor. In the middle of the page long advertisement was a small black device. We figured out that it was light sensitive (which was why it turned on when I had the paper open, but not on the floor) but couldn’t really figure out why it was there. It seems like a super expensive, hassle worthy advertising trick, but I couldn’t figure out any other reason for it.

So. Indira had a good laugh about my imaginary bees and I sheepishly went back to enjoying my coffee.

Well played newspaper advertisement – you definitely got my attention, even if I didn’t buy that car.

 

Becky

A Disappear/Re Appearing Act

Hello Masala lovers.

My sincerest apologies for disappearing into the internet ethers for a while. You can read all of my excuses here if you’d like.  My apologies also for dropping the ball with the What the Hell India project. Rest assured that I am still fully intending to continue that. Hopefully by tomorrow.

So. Bangalore has continued to treat me with the utmost respect and kindness. I still love it here.

I do not, however, really love fall here. It’s a bit too reminiscent of February in the northern half of the U.S. Minus the snow and freezing temperatures. Every day brings an overcast, grey sky that gets rather depressing after a while. I’m ready to be done with the clouds and the rain. It shouldn’t be much longer here. Winter is always beautiful.

Daddy G is again headed to the US in a few days. Hopefully for the last time this year. I’ve kind of had it with his job taking over every waking thought. Alright, so that’s a bit of an exaggeration (jeez, I still hate spelling that word), but not by much. Please dear, enjoy your nice long hot showers and not so expensive booze.  At least it’s only 10 days this time.

In other news, I have totally taken over most of the vegetables in India. My vegetarian repertoire in the US was sadly lacking, it isn’t anymore. I’m pretty excited about this. The only food related woe I have is finding a good ground meat shop. I have a serious yen for keema, which is ground meat mixed with spices and a few veggies. Serious yen. I’m good at cooking it and haven’t really had it in India. I have found a shop, I just need an excuse to haul Daddy G all the way across the neighborhood to check it out and make sure we won’t catch mad goat or mutton disease or something equally dreadful. He’s much better at knowing these things than I am.

One thing that I’m not too pleased with myself over is the health initiative that has gone nowhere. My vitamin habit have remained spotty at best (yet my hair has for the most part stopped falling out!!!) and my exercise habit, if you can even call it that, is spotty at best. Like once every 2 months spotty. I haven’t gained any of that weight back, and I suspect I’m still losing. I haven’t actually stepped on a scale since I left the US and I’m kind of afraid to lest that number didn’t actually move and I imagined the whole thing. I’m sure this isn’t true, but I’m still not checking. I now only have 1 pair of jeans that isn’t falling off my disappearing behind, and it’s pretty loose too, along with way too loose pajamas and even yoga pants.

 I did actually take out my blow up… exercise ball (And here you thought I was going to bust out an inappropriate comment about a blow up doll. You were right.) and my kettle ball. I bought these two wonderful things almost 2 years ago and now they’re finally out of the packages. I still am looking for a good routine to really challenge some muscles with them. The inserts that came in the package were sadly not all that effective. I do have a community gym at my disposal too, but between my penchant for catching up on sleep in the morning, my housekeeper showing up at random times, and my 5(!!) piano students, that is kind of hard to swing. Excuses excuses.

I’ve been on a two day binge of deep cleaning and writing these past two days, and it has been glorious. My housekeeper cleans some things for me and completely ignores others. Those cobwebs that pique my irritation every time I walk by them are conveniently ignored, as well as the dirty ceiling fans. It is indeed time to bust out the cleaning chair and slop wet, soapy, dirty water all over the floor in an attempt to clean them. It has been slow going, but oh so satisfying. I find that leaving the cleaning to someone else here has not been good for getting things done how and how often I want them too. I know that I cleaned the entire house way more in the US than it ever gets done here. Tradeoffs I guess. I work a lot more here than I did in the US too. Daddy G has been trying to campaign to get more household help so that I stop bothering him to help me do stuff. Nothing doing Mr. The last thing I need is more responsibility by having more people to manage. I’d rather just spend a day cleaning myself and have you pitch in a little bit more than normal. He’s charming that way. J

I think I’ll stop here so I can go research a topic for some What the Hell. See you soon!

Becky

What the Hell India: Bomb Blasts

Listening to: Shadow of the Day – Linkin Park

There was a bomb blast in Pune recently. For edjumacation purposes, Pune is here:

One of the most amazing things (and one of my personal favorite things) about India is that it is truly a country that absolutely oozes diversity. You can’t throw a stick around here twice without hitting 2 completely different people. The wonder of this, is that for concentration of people combined with all these differences, the amount of violence seen is relatively low. Unfortunately, it does happen.

So here’s the What the Hell for the day. Bomb Blasts.  The Pune bombs were designed to be a terrorist act that backfired and didn’t cause as much destruction as it was meant to, thank goodness. As with other attacks of this nature, they were designed to cause chaos and fear and had cause roots in both political and religious retribution.

India does have its fair share of terrorists, both domestic and imported. What is unique about the problems that India has of this type is that not all of the terrorism is related to religion, as we are used to thinking in the U.S. In India, politics often inspires this level of violence too. In fact, if you are interested, Raajneeti  is an absolutely excellent movie about Indian politics if you can find a copy with subtitles and are into foreign films.

There are always the wars that occur between criminal factions that occasionally catch an innocent bystander. As you can imagine, religion does play a part in some attacks. India is a secular country. The two main categories of religious believe in this country are Hindus and Muslims. I’m not including Buddhists because they tend to leave everyone else alone. For many reasons, there is much bad blood between the two groups and sentiments against the other group from fundamentalists from either group sometimes wander into the hatred and violence arena.

I get frustrated with action of this type. It tends to lead to bloody, unnecessary, drawn out retributions that are born out of hate for others and what they are/what they believe in.  The tragic thing about this problem is that it is probably impossible to get rid of. Biases get passed from one generation to the next. Backward thinking in people determined to stay that way is damn near impossible to change. With India being what it is, there will most likely always be points of friction when people of opposing views are pushed up against one another. What bothers me about the bomb aspect if this problem is that the perpetrators don’t care about casualties in their personal wars. India isn’t short on violence – but it can never hold its own with modern countries when blowing up different people seems like a reasonable retribution option.  There are plenty of other types of crazy here (postal system anyone?) that wouldn’t hurt India as much in its quest for modernity as bombings do. Indians, this destroys your credibility and makes the world want to lump you in with the scary fundamentalist countries - which really doesn’t do this amazing place justice.  Knock that shit off.

Becky

Launching

Mood:  Hyper (my coffee must have been strong today) and Irritated (why oh why does the housekeeper feel the need to come at a different time everyday and be here when I have to pick up my youngest from the bus stop???)

Listening to: Blow Ya Mind – Eve and Gwen Stefanie

                                                                                                                                                 

Hello Lovelies. I hope everyone is having a great week.

I wanted to tell you about a project I’m launching this week for Following the Masala. It’s called “What the Hell India?” I came up with the idea based on a previous post I had written during the A-Z challenge, which you can read here if you are interested.

India has the distinction of being an up and coming country. It is both a place where modernity has prevailed and ancient attitudes hang on stubbornly. I’ve been reading Times of India since we moved here. It tends to focus most of its stories on Bangalore, since that’s where the G family resides, but also includes lots of news from other parts of the country. Every few days, I’ll read an article that will make me stop and wonder what the hell is going on that this stuff still happens in a country that struggles to be up to date as India does. This is where we’re going to take a look at them.

Disclaimer: Most of these stories won’t be funny or comfortable. If you are a reader from India, you may even have strong feelings about a subject and/or me raising an issue as a foreigner.  I welcome comments, from any viewpoint on a subject. Please do let me know what you think of any of these posts. If you think I got it totally wrong or are missing an important aspect of something, please do let me know. I can only share from my own perspective, and one person can rarely understand every element of an issue.

Most of all, I want people – especially Indians - to be aware these things happen and that they’re not ok. This is your country.  I can sit and holler all I want as a foreigner, but it won’t do much good unless Indians decide they have had enough and won’t tolerate this anymore.

 I hope you guys enjoy it.

Becky

Cooking Gas and School Mahem

Mood: Neutral. Don’t laugh, that’s the best description I can come up with right now. Not good or bad, just meh.

Listening to: Can’t Take My Eyes off of You

Our apartment complex has a gas vendor. We don’t have cylinders (like so many independent houses do), but we have pipelines to the gas room in our apartment complex. We all have meters for our cooking gas in the kitchen and for the water heater in the third bathroom (the other two are included in maintenance charges). When you move in, you go to the gas office in the basement under one of the apartment and you get a card, which you then charge with some money. The card then goes in a meter in your house in an electrical shaft outside the kitchen. Back when we moved in, it took us quite a white to figure out all of the complexities of everyday life here, including the gas. We put Rs. 300 (about $6 US) on the card, figuring we could recharge it whenever we needed to. Well, that amount lasted us for 7 months. So you can imagine how thrilled we were about cheap cooking gas. We used to pay much, much more in the US.

Since Daddy G came home and was craving some chicken curry, that was on the menu for Sunday, as was lentils with greens (still trying to grow my hair back!). I didn’t have much other food in the house as I tend to not make full  on meals if all four of us aren’t at home.

After stopping at my little local chicken shop it was time to get down to business. I love me some cooking. I get the radio blaring with some GNR, ACDC, Velvet Revolver, Metallica, etc and sing along while creating things I love to eat. It’s like going to church for me – music and cooking. Half way through, I noticed that the chicken curry was no longer bubbling, as it should have been. I figured that maybe the back door breeze (this is not anywhere as dirty or disgusting as you think it is gentlemen) blew out the flame, which has happened before. I discovered that the lentils were no longer cooking either. In fact, none of the burners worked. We had finally run through the money we loaded the card with.

I figured, no problem, we can just go recharge the card. After grabbing my youngest to come along for company, we headed down to the basement.  There are 7 towers in my apartment complex that are all connected by a basement parking lot. I couldn’t remember where the office was, but I figured there were only so many places it could be. We slowly meandered around, checking each of the towers. We stopped in a shop to ask and she sent us across the complex. This was indeed NOT where the office was and I ended up wandering around for 15 more minutes before locating it in the last tower to be checked. Of course, their hours were Monday to Saturday. Oh was I pissed. Not only couldn’t I cook for my husband who had a serious yen after being in the US, I was worried the food wouldn’t keep half cooked until the next day, especially the greens I had soaked in salt water and chopped. I said a little prayer to the food gods and shoved everything in the fridge, pots and all, hoping I couldn’t just start up where I left off the next day.

We ended up ordering food (which was honestly pretty good) from a local restaurant, but I knew it wasn’t what Daddy G really liked. He’s one of those picky types who loves his Mama’s food. Since I learned from her, I make acceptable substitutes, restaurants do not. For dinner we had savory, spicy oatmeal. I love that stuff. It wasn’t a great culinary day, but at least we ate.

The next day, I went to the office first thing and with the assistance of 2 very polite guys, recharged my card. I managed to save all of the food I had started cooking the day before and everything came out really well, to Daddy G’s and my delight.

My husband had a good time laughing at how frustrated I got that the gas ran out on the day we couldn’t recharge it. Things like that happen here and either you roll with it, or you end up with an anger management problem. I would like to think I roll pretty well with life here, but every once I start getting twitchy. Like any time I deal with my kids’ school. You would think we deal with a government institution the way that everything turns out about 3 times more complicated than it needs to be. We’ve been having some drama with checks being returned due to signature differences. 

When I wrote the checks, I was standing in a stifling hot basement office in a line waiting to be seen in a cubicle by a harassed, cranky man whose name I won’t mention because I seriously don’t need anyone at that school hating me more than they already seem to. To be honest, my signature didn’t look at all the same trying to sign it under those circumstances and the bank returning them was valid. I found out about it from the bank and went the extra mile of hiring a cab and dropping off new checks (which I signed exactly like they should have been!) at the school. The school is now harassing me to send in Demand Drafts (which are like money orders for two other checks to make sure they get the money coming to them. I refuse. They are getting checks because I am not making a special trip to the bank when I have checks at home. Poor Daddy G listened to me rant for a few minutes and then asked me what the big deal was. The bank is a few minutes’ walk, why not just go get one. I told him it was a matter of principle and there was no reason why they couldn’t just take another check. There really is no point in fighting the school; it won’t do me any good and I’m aware of it. I just am tired of jumping through hoops to deal with them about ordinary matters. I don’t think I’ve ever had such a hassle with schools and my oldest has been in school for the past 5 years. It’s a matter of principle.

Becky

Check it.

I'm over at my Just Passing Through blog. You should go check it out (if you don't already) for some Indian bees, Kanada movies, and a new skirt.

Becky

An Update on the War Against Clean Clothes

Listening to: Hindi music videos

Mood: Hungry. Shut up, that is too a mood.

There are days when I really, really hate living in India. But don’t tell anyone, ok? I don’t want to hear anyone say “I told you so!”

Today was one of those days. India has a thing with power cuts; I’m sure you can imagine with so many people trying to use a limited resource. Most people and bigger complexes, like the one I live in, have backup generators that supply limited power if the regular current goes out.  It’s both a great help and a source of endless frustration.

The problem with the backup power supply is the limited part. Certain things in our house take up a lot of power. See water heaters, microwaves and, unfortunately, washing machines. If you try to use said appliances, it overloads the system and everything shuts off for a few seconds. If you’re not smart enough to turn off the appliance tripping the system, it will continue tripping until you shut it off. This is a ginormous problem for my router. Every time the power goes out, I have to wait for it to reconnect. Addicted? Says who?

This past week, our power has being going on and off like a junkie who can’t find a steady crack supplier. Of course,  the power only seems to want to switch off when I’m trying to get something done. Like eat breakfast. And then I get all stabby when I realize that I have to wait for the regular power to come back on so I can make coffee. No coffee=irrationally angry Becky G. I am so not making oatmeal and coffee on the stove. Or when I’m trying to take a shower or give my daughters a shower. When you only have 1 hour in which to bathe two children and the power won’t cooperate, it’s enough to make you want to just leave already.

But the king of all kickers is when I’m trying to do laundry. I generally do laundry around 10 am, or when I’m finished crawling out of bed and making coffee. I do this so the laundry will be done when my housekeeper comes over so she can hang it up on the insufficient wooden rack.  I will never, ever be an early morning person. Ever. This is about the time when the power starts acting funny. There’s no logic or rhythm to it, it goes on and off randomly.  The irritating thing is I can pause the washer if the backup power goes on. But it turns off (i.e. wherever in the cycle it was is lost) after a certain amount of time if you leave it on pause, so it’s not on pause indefinitely. The power never seems to come back before the pause time runs out. I love my washer, but it doesn’t have a cycle dial. It has a colors, whites, etc. dial. So you can’t go back to where in the cycle it was and just continue the wash. You have to start over. Currently, the load in the washer today has been started 3 times. It only has a half hour left; I’m hoping it can get through this time.

There aren’t too many things that make me want to just pack up and go home, but this is one.

On another note of interesting things happening on this side of the world in my house, they fixed the bathroom sewer smell problem. Apparently, a waste water facility in my apartment complex exploded (no, I’m not kidding) and contaminated all the previously cleaned water, hence the smell. I’m totally thrilled about this!

Another not so awesome thing is that ants have built some kind of home in my wall. Their front door is right underneath my bathroom door in a corner. I see them going in and out of this quarter inch crack all the time. They don’t really bother anyone unless you have children who forget to put away a vanilla yogurt cup overnight and you wake up to about 80 bazillion ants on your kitchen table having an orgy. Then it kind of becomes a problem. At least they’re not the evil red bitey ones that live outside. I hate those things.  But we keep the house really clean and I will get to the store and buy ant spray one of these days.

Becky


(Actually India, I don’t hate you. Take me back, I promise to never say such things again. Please don’t take away all the yummy chaats and byriani!)

Olfactory Fun

Listening to: Dr. Feelgood – Motley Crew. Kickin it old school today.

Mood: Happy – Got some work done today.

Hello there. Time for more stories about life in India. Today’s topic is smells.  India is not for the faint of nose. Or heart for that matter, but we’re talking about noses today. Pile so many people, animals, and foods in one country and olfactory overload is almost impossible to avoid.

We’ll start with the good smells:

The Air. When I first came to India with Daddy G 7 years ago (damn it’s been a long time!), the first thing I noticed when I stepped off the airplane is the smell. It hangs in the air here. It’s like a mix of incense, sweat, people, cows, burning trash and coconuts, because Daddy G is South Indian. It’s just a part of the air. You never get away from it, although after a while, you notice it less. I’m not saying it’s a bad smell. It’s just quintessential India. I thought about this smell before we got on the plane to move here. I was really looking forward to that smell again.For some reason, when you put them all together and un-concentrated in the air, it's not as bad as single concentrated smells.

The Food. India has some amazing and varied choices when it comes to food. For someone who is a spice and spicy junkie, it’s heaven. Even if I don’t cook a meal, at least one of my neighbors is, and it will invariably smell amazing. So amazing that I almost want to knock on the door and beg a meal. Almost, I’m not that shameless. Chat is also included here. Chat are small, usually savory snacks that people here munch on around 5 pm. Anywhere public you walk around this time, you’ll smell it. Spicy yumminess floating around – even if it’s from the typhoid cart trying to pass out poison pani puris. (small crispy shells with flavored water and other yummies inside)

Incense. Indians are big on incense. It happens to be a smell I love, especially sandalwood.

The bad:

Sewage. There’s no getting around it – this many people produce this much waste. Drains are not always covered. When it’s hot, it really gets gag worthy. This includes the recycled water they use in our toilets in my compound. My bathroom always smells like sewage and I hate it. Hard.

Animals. Lots o stray dogs and cows also produce lots of stink and poop of their own.

Garbage. People here don’t always bother to find the nearest trash bin and most of the time, there just isn’t one. Trash is burned in the less urbane places too, like the village next to my house. Which leads me to…

Burning trash/coconut shell heaps. This is my Achilles heel. I can deal with the sewage smell, the animals and the trash, but the burning piles of disgustingness really get to me.  I’m glad I’m not pregnant. This one would have me puking every time I turned around.

Sweat. India is hot. Get a whole bunch of Indians in a room in the middle of summer and it is bad.

Automobile fumes. Lots of folks here have cars. An insane amount in fact. Nothing like choking on a nice big lung full of car exhaust when you’re on/near the road.

Eventually you become used to all of these smells, but every once in a while one will sucker punch you and you’ll be all, “Hot damn India!”, for good or for bad. Most days I don’t mind the bad smells so much and really enjoy the good ones!

Becky

On National Holidays and Traditions When You Aren’t Geographically Present

Listening to: Suraj Ki Baahon Mein - Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara 

Mood: Reminiscent

It is smack dab in the middle of the summer in the USA. In fact, it’s July 4^th day (on my side of the world anyhow). For the first time in, oh, ever, I am not in the US for the 4^th. There will be no barbecues, no fireworks, and no excessive alcohol intake with friends. In fact, the only extraordinary thing happening today is that I am launching piano lessons. With an actual student.  There’s a huge part of me that wonders what this girl’s parents were thinking agreeing to let me teach their daughter. After all, I’m the one your mother warned you about, even if I am qualified to teach piano lessons. I’m pretty thankful to that girl’s parents for giving me the chance to pass on my passion to someone else though. I’m terrified and thrilled at the same time. But hey, the take a chance and move around the world thing worked out well, so why not give this a go too? Wish me luck people. Better yet, wish that student luck.

I am so far off topic here I probably couldn’t find my way back with a compass.  Not that I know how to use one anyhow. Speaking of which: Camping. I have been seeing lots and lots o posts about camping, and I must say that I am green with envy. Our current geographical location doesn’t really cater to camping. Seriously, there is no such thing as campers in India that I’ve seen. The bigger problem with our family is that Daddy G is categorically opposed to anything that doesn’t involve actual beds and wifi. When I was little, my parents (bless their nomadic hearts) loved camping. We lived out in L.A. and had a tiny trailer hookup camper that my dad towed behind their silver Subaru. No, I’m not quite sure how the physics of that work out either – so don’t ask.  We made good use of the Arizona/New Mexico mountains. My favorite destination of all time was Ghost Town AZ. Seriously amazing place It was cramped and not always comfortable, but people, I’m about to break out into song here about the memories. It was glorious.

It looked like this:

I seriously don't know the physics of shoving 4 people in this camper.

When I got a bit older, my folks moved to IL and we bought a bigger RV camper and stowed it at a campground in Morris IL. If you’re from Morris, you’ll know that there’s absolutely nothing out there. Or there didn’t use to be. I haven’t been out there in at least 20 years. Again, some very magical times. I’m not sure how we didn’t out right die from catching snakes, making forts, throwing milk-weed pods, throwing things in campfires, and generally roaming the entire campground by ourselves.  So enjoy your camping people. I’m still campaigning over here to get Daddy G to even try it.

Holidays are a bit funny when you’re off somewhere else. I don’t think I really sat and thought too much about holidays abroad apart from Christmas. Aside from that one freakish year we moved to Key West and were there over Christmas, I wondered how different it would be. Obviously, no one celebrates the 4^th of July here. They have absolutely no reason to. Indian Independence Day is at a completely different time. This is another instance of things that make me feel completely disconnected with life before we moved here. I’m not even quite sure what to do with this though. I think it’s a bit ridiculous to celebrate by myself. The kids don’t ask about it. I never thought about how easy it would be to absorb the local holidays/festivals – we are all over Diwali in our house – and be completely removed from events that actually mean more to me than I knew.  Actually, everything American just seems so far away, both from a physical and emotional distance point of view. This is most likely a defense mechanism on my part – after all, I can’t sit and mope around all the time missing things. It also shows you how your own reality takes over your brain space. I can’t live 2 places at once.  I guess I’m greedy. I want ALL the holidays. I wasn’t my past reality and my present reality to mesh seamlessly, which is absolutely, completely unrealistic.

I hope you all enjoy your summer vacations and your 4^th of July holiday. To those of you who choose to indulge in the adult beverage of your choice, enjoy one for me and give an extra cheer for the fireworks for me. Have your kids jump in the pool one last time for me. I’m pretty sure my tenure in  India will end much sooner than I would like and I’ll find myself bemoaning the fact that I can’t find good byriani in the states.

Becky

Laziness

Hello people,

I know I've been largely absent for a week or so from this blog. I promise to be back on Monday to give you all some more of my fabulous writing.

It's just too beautiful in Bangalore this weekend and I'm having an attack of laziness.  Even brain work is just too much to ask from this lazy weekend.

Here's hoping you all have fabulous weekend!

Becky

I'm Following Myself

So I was checking out the stats for my blogs today, as I'm wont to do, and noticed that I had a new follower. Thrilled, I opened up the link and to my great surprise...that follower was me. Damn it. I think a worm hole just opened up somewhere.

Anyone know why this happened? I have 6 blogs, and it only happened for 3 of them. It just seems kind of sad to me. Like your mother telling you she's the biggest member of your fan club, kinda doesn't count. It's also in the same class as "liking" your own stuff on Facebook, it's just kind of, well, stupid, for lack of a better word.

So. Just in case anyone was wondering, I didn't list my own blogs in my blogger blog list and I can't quite figure out how to remove them just yet. I promise my head hasn't swelled up so much that I must follow myself.

Becky

Masala Chai

Last one for today. There is nothing like a great cup of Masala Chai - especially if it's raining.

For 2 cups Chai, you'll need:
~2 - 3 spoons of loose tea powder. Don't you dare use tea bags. Or cut open tea bags - that's just wrong.

~1 C water

~1 C milk

~2 green cardamoms, cracked so they're open, but the seeds aren't falling out

~4 small pieces of cinnamon bark

~2 - 3 whole cloves

~5 spoons sugar

Small metal pot

Fine sieve for straining


To Make:
Boil water, cloves, cardamoms, and cinnamon on stove in pot. When water is boiling, add tea powder. When water boils again, add milk. Heat until milk is hot but not boiling and tea is dark tan in color. Feel free to adjust time for how strong you like your tea - longer cooking=stronger tea. Add sugar to pot and stir well.

Strain tea through sieve into cups and serve hot. Enjoy!

Eggplant Curry

More Cooking Sharing.

Eggplant Curry

You’ll need:

~1 kg (2.2 lbs) small eggplants that look like this:

In India, this is all we find, but you may have to hunt a little in the US. I’ve never used the huge ones. They should be shiny, smooth, and not have holes. If you live in India, stick those suckers in some salt water for about 15 minutes and make sure you check for black spots inside when you cut them - that be bugs.

~About 3 Tbsp channa dal, that look like this:

This is NOT the same as channa (chickpea) beans, nor the fried Channa dal that people use for chutney. If anyone knows what this is called in the US, let me know. You can find them in an Indian grocery.

~About 2 Tbps Urad Dal that looks like this:

Urad dal is a white lentil. You can also find these in an Indian grocery.

~3 red onions, peeled, and chopped to small pieces

~3 green chiles (either Thai bird chiles, or jalapenos) you can change this as per how much you want it spicy, like this:

They should be cut in half lengthwise. Yummy!

~Handful of green curry leaves, 2 – 3 stems, looks like this:

They’re called Curry Patta here and have a strong peppery smell.

~1 tsp salt

~ One large pressure cooker

~One wooden/metal spoon for smooshing the eggplant after it cooks.

~Oil – any cooking oil is fine, but I prefer Olive or Sunflower.

~1 tsp turmeric powder

~Chopped Cilantro for garnish

To Make:

Heat oil in pressure cooker until hot, but not smoking. Fry Channa dal and Urad dal in the pressure for 1 minute. Turn heat to medium. Add onions, chilis, and curry leaves. You’ll probably need an air vent/fan at this point, but hang in there. It’s not so strong when it’s done.

Fry onions, chilis, and leaves until onions are browned thoroughly but not burnt, stirring occasionally. Cut eggplants into small chunks, removing any stems/leaves (insert pot joke here), adding to pan as you cut. They turn brown if you leave them out. Add 1 tsp salt and stir a little. Remember, you can always add more, but too much will screw up a dish big time. Place cover and weight on pressure cooker and turn heat to high. When your cooker starts whistling (or screaming, like mine does), turn heat to low and cook for 15 minutes.

When done, turn heat off. Either very carefully (with a silicone mitt if you have one) let off the steam from the cooker, let it sit and cool on its own for 10 minutes or until pressure is gone, or run it under cold water for a minute or two until pressure is gone. Carefully open lid (there will still be some steam) and set aside. Using wooden or metal stirring spoon, stir well, being careful not to splash on yourself, mashing eggplant chunks against side of pan. Stir in turmeric and cilantro. Taste for salt and add as needed.

Serve with flat bread or rice.

Enjoy